Why santa is jolly : Adult Poetry

Let me tell you a story of holiday cheer.

about santa, a reindeer ,and two cases of beer.

See it all started with gambling reindeer.

Santa he said your a fat ass queer.

You dress in that red suit you chubby ass elf .

For petes sake man look at yourself!

That woman of yours she keeps you locked up .

you need a drink and a night of fun.

Those kids wont know if you take a night off.

For crying out loud enough is enough!

Have you no pity man where is your pride.

Tell mrs claus to go fly a kite!

Dont you get tired of that jingle bells song.

Im telling you man something needs to be done.

The reindeer then offered santa a beer.

Two cases later everthing was clear .

He needed a holiday at least once a year.

So he could get shit faced with the reindeer.

So he chose the first saturday before christmas eve,

AND thats why hes so jolly I do believe.