Happy Valentines Day NYC
Like most Americans, I love New York. The city of dreams, where every pilgrim crossed. The great gateway to the world, the city that never sleeps and it doesn’t. Valentines day to me is NYC because I use to go to NY around that date to toy fair. While I love to make you all think I am a hick from the sticks, in reality I am a traveled girl.
You may all think of Christmas and Santa Claus as the holiday dreams happen, for me its Valentines day. And believe me there is no city that makes you feel like you a peon but in NYC the dream is, “if I can make it there I can make it anywhere!.” Love that song Frank.
I can’t explain the glimmer of excitement of toy fair, if you are big or small there is just a thrill and excitement going to the Javits center and seeing all the prototypes of dreams and schemes of inventors of toys. It all represents the AMERICAN DREAM to me. I remember my first trip to Toy Center, its this cool old brick building, filled with little rooms each representing toys and how each manufacturing rep.. While you all picture Santa and his little work shop, it was rude awakening to see there weren‘t any willy wonka toy factories or a company that just made toys. It was all this little series of hitch companies, each doing their little part to the whole of multi conglomerate big business. And toys are big business, one of the biggest pies in the sky. Of course I knew you all had lead in your toys years ago. It was not a big surprise to me, what was the surprise was it took so long for you to figure it out. And I also realized long ago, there were no little workshops that designed toys that make it, oh maybe a few but that was back in the days you all played games and talked to each other. I saw the coolest toy inventions, games but what I found is, you never did.
My first trip to Ellis Island was an emotional experience, to see that great statue Liberty.
I have seen the Eiffel tower and the wonders of Pairs, but there is no more beautiful sign post than Liberty. AS a sculptor I love her strength and presence and there is not like her! Riding in a boat across that river my mind felt the beating hearts of dreams that crossed that path, the souls cried to me from the sea. I was surprisingly touched by a wave of emotion of tears. I thought of all the people who must have had great courage to leave their homes, families and all they knew reaching for the dream.
My heart pounded in my chest, my hands shock and my body quivered knowing exactly how much elation and fear a person must have felt crossing the channel to freedom and dreams! And I was on a tourist boat. That is the power of that dream!
As I rode the boat in awe, I felt as if I were on a pilgrimage. The strangest thing is, my trip was the same as your and my ancestors. And while this was all before 911, I knew my voyage then was for NY and America. You, see world I knew you needed me way before you did. I knew the problems before they happened and I as an inventor I set some insane path, devoting my life to the American dream and bringing my people CHOICE.
My business partner and then fiancé’ John Wayne (really his name) would go to NYC each year and follow my dream. This was in the early nineties you know, when we still really had some of the dream left.. I have to mention Mr. Wayne because without his help, belief in my toys and dreams I would have never traveled to NYC. And he really spoiled me, my first trip I jumped in a cab, I flew in alone and asked the taxi driver to give me the tour, including Harlem. The friendly Muslim cab driver smiled at me knowing I was a green as dirt but he was kind and didn’t rip me off. He carefully drove me through, to see it really was like in the movies for those of you whom haven’t been to NYC. In central park there is this cool restaurant and if you are rich or have fiancé’ who can afford it, you get to eat at Tavern on the Green. And you better bring your green. I did not marry Mr. Wayne but for the record it was not because he wasn’t, isn’t one of the nicest guys on earth and deserves the name., my duke.
I went to all the normal tourist spots but I think the thing that touched and freaked me out is all the tall buildings with the narrow streets. I am a bit of a what you call it, weird about tall buildings and none freaked me out like the world trade center. When Mr. Wayne arranged the Valentines day right before the first year they were bombed for a dinner at the top, I refused to go. He was mad, I had no reason I could site other than I said those buildings give me really bad vibes. I just said NO, and I have learned when I don’t follow that gut feeling that says no, bad things happen. So, I never ate or visited the trade centers. I just looked at them and felt weird, worried. Of course when we came home and they were bombed the first time, he began to notice my instinct was odd and it was then he started to believe in my gut instinct.
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Then when we arrived home and developed the pictures of me across the channel and the buildings were not in the pictures, frame by frame a couple in and a couple they were GONE. Now oddly enough they were in John Wayne’s pictures but not the pictures of me. In some of them the towers disappeared into an empty of them skyline, needless to say when they went down he called me and he and I realized it was more than a weird coincidence but that is when I realized something about film could tell me things, including the future. And I can prove this and this is not a story, it’s the truth about this doll.
Mr. Wayne is a devote Catholic, and I will not cite religious reasons for us not marrying but it didn’t help. His faith was beautiful, but ours butted heads in some areas and we loved to argue in jest our differ3ences of faith. He loved his scapulars and iconic relics to worship and I just felt it was a commandment breach case. He loved his visions of Mary fatima, and there was nothing he loved, loves more than his rosary. He loved carrying it and for some reason he needed his trinkets to hang onto. And for him, I can understand he has a child with autism and he relied greatly upon his faith to help him through the fact his only beautiful, normal looking son has had to live his life in a home for the mentally handicapped. And while it is nor has it been to him a burden, it truly was a hard cross to bear in life and did hurt our relationship. Things are just different between x’s when you have a mentally handicapped child and it puts a strain on the newer party that I couldn’t bear (that’s honest.) It did make me take great interest in these type of children, and oddly enough Mr. Jacobus is in the business of taking care of these type of children.
And it was his love for them and devotion that did make me make him my final choice, to date. So, I am going to blurb it here. Mr. Jacobus and I are divorced but we still live together working on a relationship that is still hard but thus far we have not given up on.
One of the things Mr. Wayne and I would do is visit every Catholic church and the most beautiful I have seen is St. Patrick’s in New York city. And I admit even though I am not a registered Catholic, I broke the law and took communion there. And when I was there the year before they bombed the towers, I had my head wiped in a cross of ashes for New York because I knew it would be covered in ashes. I can’t tell you how happy I was to see that building in the mass of ashes and waste still standing. And to you architects can find what ever logic explanation for them standing but when I was there I laid my head to the ground to the floor and prayed for NYC. Not knowing why, and I remember seeing so many people with ashes that Ash Wednesday and I knew they NYC would survive.
I could go on and on about NYC and how I love thee and how to all the skeptics who will find some reason to not believe that I did write visions of NYC in water before all your computer maps saw here potential under. I just want you to know NYC I am still praying your not covered in water. I am still hoping you will all go to ST Patrick’s and pray with me that your sex, in the city and your violence and perversions that have crossed your shore will not cover you in water this time. And do tell the Cardinals I said this but God said you can, take communion in his church without being a Catholic and it is and your idolatry why I am not a Catholic. And I have many letters to your church, and a messages from your last pope, after he died recording the moment he went to heaven after the UFO‘s appeared over the Vatican. But I will leave it as this, when I saw your city COVERED in water I again wiped myself in ashes and sac cloth and this time baptized myself in clean water for you. The water of the spirit you must find NYC to save your city. And I would like to say, at least during a crisis you held each other up. You did not kill, cheat and rob like New Orleans you banded together and acted like human beings. I love you New York, I have not visited you since then.
But my prayers are with you and to the greatest city that never sleeps, keep awake.
And this ASH Wednesday go to church, America and pray that whatever spell of darkness that 911 has put on our nation, that city is lifted off in clean rain that doesn’t flood your city with a typhoon.
And just so you all know, I never told my story because I kept waiting for a happy ending. I kept waiting to have this great story to tell you all where I sold my doll and dreams came true because I know you all love a winner, not a loser. I know you all love the happy ending. I kept waiting to write it for you, but the day never came.
And I know the world judges people by their success, their fame, fortune.
I had = have no happy ending except that I still have faith. And God instead of giving me a plastic doll, he made me your angel redeemer doll, your patron, your Liberty, your voice freedom.
So as Valentines day comes, I dream again, not so big, just another stop on my liberty trail. The strange thing is God never tells me my future, I learned when I invented my date with destiny game. Even if you can tell the future, its best not to know.
Live each day the best you can and keep dreaming, keep hoping and never give up on your dreams. I feel confident that the future will remember me kindly, and all I ask is that you all remember my dream. Freedom of Choice, the right choice God.
So, like a child at Christmas I always dream of a Santa Claus toy company, I know doesn’t exist on Valentines day. The day of lovers -- I dream and I pray my Lord will bless me as his lover of all that is good and holy, for his children.
God tells me, my future is a surprise and perhaps I will watch my dream from heaven, but I want you all to know, even when I die I will be in the sky, watching over LIBERTY.
Nemesis guardian of the city of Angels= all of them.
Originally Posted On Site: 2008-01-24 07:49:29
Last Login: 04.01.09
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