Choices or Destiny? : Inspirational Poetry

Have you ever notice some people live the most charmed existence?

Things,

always go- their way, its as if lady luck lives on their shoulder-

I have known people like this.

It

never seems to matter what they do- right or wrong.

Their lives are- filled with good luck. Opportunity falls- on their shoulders.

Life seems to smile- every good thing on some peoples life.

I have know people who every time they drive in a parking lot, the first spot is always just sitting open-- waiting for them. -

And I have noticed it had nothing to do with choice, education,

hard work, setting goals- visualization or positive thinking.

Some people just seem to be born with - all the luck, why?

Life seemingly honors them in every way!

I am not saying these people didn’t work, or they never deserved a good thing

or break. Its just that some people get every one of them in life.

And people- all around them often deserve their breaks, more. They live

a charmed existence.. Why?

Then there are all the rest of us poor slobs, nothing goes right. No matter how hard some work, or what they do, they never get a break.

For some, life is a series of one bad experience after another. And life never gives them any opportunity, everything

seems to go wrong. Living a life of one thing after another going wrong.

I have noticed these are generally

The good people, the really good people- who so often really don‘t deserve such terrible luck!

After years of one bad break after another in life.

And never receiving the break, being passed over, knocked around

Not- ever- getting the break (some I worked very hard for and others managed to get who didn‘t work as hard or seemed- as worthy.)

I sat my course to change that.

What if I carefully calculated every choice?

Would that help? Could thinking through every choice change the course of a life filled-

with what everyone around me came to notice was bad luck.

For the first few decades of my life, I thought it was my behavior, it had to do with mistakes I had made, it was my fault. And everyone blamed me, when bad things happened

People- I knew would say well- “if you hadn’t done this or that” whatever bad thing happened wouldn’t

happen- if I just did things right, or worked harder, watched what I did.

I began a pattern of always blaming myself,

and carefully calculating my choices to change my destiny,

certain- that if I just made the right choice path.

It would change my life, but it never did.

As a matter of fact, I found my choices became harder, and harder to make.

Each situation I would carefully think out, thinking of it as a scientist, including watching who- I became involved with, as friends or lovers.

I found that no matter how I sliced it or diced it, life became a series of tests.

And their was a definite pattern to it.-

The pattern was, I was set to fail each and every test, trial or tribulation that came into my life. I did the math on it, it seemed to go like this

Seven tests- no matter what I would fail one of them, it would start again =

Then the trials would come, awful things- one after another but I noticed- there really is -------

Math to it- it was always--- at least three things bad- in a row.

Then the tests and trials, the tests would be silly little things, for example -someone giving me too much change back at the store- I noticed I was constantly tested everyday, everywhere I went on choices.

Just when I was doing really well, with my choices game plan, when=I had done everything right, bam-

something out of left field came to crash my life again.

For example, at one point I thought it was debt,

as most Americans I lived on credit cards, often buying what I didn’t need.

Being a Christian, God fearing person, I told myself it was my debt, I wasn’t a good steward with my money. That was the only thing at that point I could find seriously wrong with my choices.-

I sat a path to get out of debt, paid off everything. I remember this time- it was near Christmas, I decided in my game plan to pay cash for every gift. The rule became in my life- cash no credit. It was working great, I had just bought a new business- I sold my house, paid cash for it and paid off every debt. It was going wonderful and my plan was working- life was better= finally!

The one thing I couldn’t afford in my plan was health insurance.

That was in my plan, right after the holidays

Lo and behold right before Christmas, I came down with pneumonia. All those paid for wrapped presents sat under the tree during the holidays, while I spend Christmas and New Years in the hospital fighting for my life, I almost died from my choices game quest that time.

I ended up in debt, so much debt from the hospital bills and not being able to run my business I ended up losing- my business.

What on this earth had I done wrong? Nothing really,

I could calculate a few imperfections in myself but compared to others- I knew, know= there was nothing- no act I had committed, no bad or dirty deed-that I did to deserve being sick and going head down straight to the pits of despair and debt overnight and losing everything.

Of course, par to my course of choices, somehow I wiped myself up off the floor again and started again to find another slide down again, over and over it happened.

All my life, while I watched many around me- - with entirely - charmed lives

Who were often judgmental of my life, always finding some thing, they felt

I did wrong- you know like I would cuss them out for being judgmental pigs about it. So, it was you know - I said a cuss word or something- people can always find something wrong with you.

Even though I was the best Christian they knew.

And I can tell you, living my life in chaos didn’t help me salvage many souls who would see my life always in the crap can by doing right. -

My plan of calculating my choices, doing everything right, didn’t work again.

I could write several books of these types of situations, and far worse happenings in life of things gone completely out of control, to kick me down in life.

I do know-

it made me stronger, in fact it made me one of the strongest people= I know.

And everyone I know says that about me.

But I have never figured out what I did to deserve all the bad things that happened to me, including abuse, being stalked by a nut for many years, who ended up raping a child- who was obviously=after mine.

A person I thought I could change by being nice, who became worse and worse.

Who is now in prison. To say it bluntly, I learned from this person, you can’t change people and there isn’t any point in trying. Because bad people get worse-

The situations just seemed to become ever more terrible, the harder I tried to make the right choices, the worse it became in life.

Yet, I did notice the people who seemed to have the charmed life, didn’t really live their life for Jesus, they didn’t calculate their choices and really didn’t live by-

Any real moral code, and if any of them took a salvation road, when it became hard and the bad things started coming their way, they jumped off the harder road of choice game theory- FAST

Some of them still live a somewhat charmed life, they still get the first parking place, but I have noticed as I age and experience life. One by one these people are getting their come up-ence.

One by one I have seen them eventually find life isn’t so charmed for them.

I guess what goes around does eventually come around-

And what I have really noticed is they -the charmed ones can’t deal with it.

They have no coping skills what so ever. To them a mere paper cut is a stab mortal wound.

They totally freak out over any little struggle as if its horrible, things I coped with-

thinking it was nothing, and they feel and go out of control- over the smallest

Bad thing.

As I played my game of life- choices or destiny

I found a great prize, the prize of all prizes

I received the power of angels, I can see light, and when I see the devil and I do

In people, I just leave their presence. And the devil leaves mine now.

You see, I earned in my game- the choice of being happy.

I don’t expect anything, and I am happy with any thing-

I can cope, my charmed friends, can’t and I see now as I am getting older.

I am the one with the charmed life.

Now they get to face all the hell, they do and eventually will pay for.

One way or another time - destiny catches up with everyone.

And frankly

I won the choices game, it was the white stone- the prize of all prizes.

I get heaven on earth, and ghee in an emergency all my charmed friends

Call me saying-

What did I do to deserve this?

I never tell them because I also learned to be the bigger person, with the coping skills. So, if you have friends, family and people at work who seem to be charmed remember the charms do catch up with them.

You just have to live a long time to do the math to prove it.

I still play my game, I find life is more peaceful now.

Is it choice, or destiny?

Both in my opinion.

Nemesis

Guardian of the gateway to the right choice-

the choices girl doll

the doll who teaches you to think about your choices